fear of abandonment

  • What causes ‘approach and avoid’ behaviour

    What causes ‘approach and avoid’ behaviour

    ‘Approach and avoid’ describe a pattern where someone may simultaneously crave intimacy and connection while also fearing it, leading to a push-pull dynamic in  personal relationships. It’s often linked to attachment styles, emotional regulation, underlying fears, or unmet needs. Here are some reasons why this might happen: 1. Attachment styles Etiam placerat velit vitae…

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  • Why conflict feels so scary for some

    Why conflict feels so scary for some

    Conflict is a complex issue, and it can feel really scary for some people due to a combination of psychological, emotional, and past experiences. Here we explore the underlying reasons: 1. Fear of rejection or abandonment For many, conflict triggers a deep-seated fear of being rejected or abandoned. If someone has experienced rejection or…

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  • How to stop feeling responsible for others’ feelings

    How to stop feeling responsible for others’ feelings

    Feeling responsible for others’ feelings is a very common struggle and is often linked to things like people-pleasing tendencies, perfectionism, or even trauma history. It can create a lot of emotional burden, because we internalise others’ moods or reactions as though they are our job to manage. But in reality, while we can offer…

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  • How to deal with the silent treatment

    How to deal with the silent treatment

    Dealing with the silent treatment, especially from someone we care deeply about, can be emotionally painful and confusing. It’s often used as a way of expressing frustration, anger, or a need for space, but it can leave the recipient feeling isolated, unheard, and powerless. Here are some healthy ways to navigate this situation: 1.…

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  • Do we have codependent tendencies?

    Do we have codependent tendencies?

    Codependent tendencies refer to patterns of behaviour in which a person tends to prioritize the needs, desires, and well-being of others over their own, often to the point of neglecting their own emotional, physical, or mental health. This dynamic can develop in various types of relationships, but it is typically common in intimate partnerships,…

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  • Signs of incompatibility across all types of relationships

    Signs of incompatibility across all types of relationships

    Incompatibility in relationships typically arises when values, priorities, or behaviours don’t align. It can show up in various forms, depending on the dynamics between the individuals involved. Below are the signs across all relationships: Etiam placerat velit vitae dui blandit sollicitudin. Vestibulum tincidunt sed dolor. These signs are commonly caused by: Irreconcilable differences Communication…

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  • What to expect when we start setting healthy boundaries

    What to expect when we start setting healthy boundaries

    It’s a given that we’d experience difficulties when we try to set healthy personal boundaries, particularly with people who have come to rely on our lack of boundaries. When we don’t set clear limits on how others can treat us — whether in relationships, work, or social situations — there may be an unspoken,…

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  • What is ‘crapfit’?

    What is ‘crapfit’?

    ‘Crapfit’ is a word Anna Runkle made up, for the phenomenon where people traumatised in childhood get too good at fitting themselves to unacceptable people and situations.  This term to describe a situation where we find ourselves fitting into relationships, situations, or environments that are not good for us, not because we actually belong…

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  • Why speaking up for ourselves matters

    Why speaking up for ourselves matters

    Learning to speak up for ourselves is an important step in empowering ourselves. At the same time, we also fear the fallout. Below are the reasons why the potential difficulties are worthwhile: 1. Self-respect and Personal Integrity When we speak up for ourselves, we honour our own needs, feelings, and boundaries. It’s a way…

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